Babysitter, DayCare, or Stay At Home Mom?

A Fax Came Through At My Job A Few Weeks Ago And Although I Didn't Meet All The Requirements For The Position I Thought I'd Give It A Try Anyway. I Thought On It, Prayed About It, Even Went As Far As Asking My Regional Loss Prevention Manager If He Thought I Should Give It A Shot. He Said I Wouldn't Know Unless I Tried. But After A Few More Days Of Deliberation I Just Couldn't Bring Myself To Put In The Application. Carlos And I Had Just Found Out We Are Expecting And This Amazing News Just Kept Poking Holes In The Idea Of Pursuing That Job. The Position Would Have Required Frequent Travel Between Three States To Over See Loss Prevention For A New District. The Training Would End And The Travel Would Start Just A Bit After Little Newton(s) Are Born. The Idea Of Being Away From Our Newborn For Several Days At A Time Just Weeks After Coming Home Just Didn't Sit Well With Me. The Idea Of Leaving A Newborn With A Babysitter Or In A DayCare Just Doesn't Appeal To Me At The Moment Either. (However That Baby Isn't Here Yet So This Idea Is Subject To Change). But With The Current Mind Set The Only Other Option Would Be To Take On The Stay At Home Mom Challenge. Now I'm Well Aware That Many Stay At Home Moms Work From Home and That Sounds A Little More My Speed. However, That Means I'd Have To Find A Legit Form Of Work That Would Fit Into My Routine Of Dishing Out New Diapers And Sweeping Up Cheerios.

*Enters Carlos After A Hard Day At Work*
He Looks So Tired, He's Covered In Dirt, And He Has To Kick Off His Heavy Work Boots At The Door. He Gives Me A Smile And Tells Me For The Zillionth Time Not To Hug Him Cuz He's Sweating And He Stinks. (I Don't Get Why He Doesn't Understand That I Don't Care...I'm Just Happy He's Home). I Look At Him And I Wonder Where I Ever Got The Idea Of Leaving The Work Force. He Works SOOOOOOOOOOOO Hard To Keep Food On The Table And A Roof Over Our Heads. He'd Be Gone From Sunrise To Sunset If I Just Stopped Working. He'd Never Complain To Me Though. He'd Just Come Home, Kick Off His Boots, Kiss Me, And Sleep For A Few Hours. Needless To Say Not Working Just Doesn't Seem Like An Option For Me, At Least Not If I Ever Want To See My Husband Again.

This Train Of Thought Got Me To Wondering About What Other New Moms Decided To Do. What Option Did You Go With? Are There More Options? Did You Go Through More Than One Of These Options As Your Kids Got Older? Was This An Easy Or Hard Decision Between Your And Spouse? Are Any Of You Currently In This Position?

Please Lovely Ladies Let Me Know Your Thoughts
(Please Be Respectful Of The Options You DIDN'T Choose. Other Wonderful Mommies May Have Picked A Different Option Than You)


ps. Oh! Baby Newton Has Reached 7 Weeks :)

Teenage Boy Syndrome

From Teresia:

Our Recent Trip To Columbus Highlighted For Me One Major Skill I'm Lacking In. I've Dubed It Teenage Boy Syndrome...Let Me Explain

Teenage Boy Syndrome: The Inability To Form Coherent Thoughts Or Sentences Around Females Of The Human Species.

When Ever I'm Around Other Women I Seem To Just Shut Down.

In My Brain: Hey! I Want To Know Everything About You. I Want A Deep, Meaningful, And Long Friendship With You.

What Comes Out Of My Mouth: I...I Umm...I Like Your Shirt *FacePalm*

At The End Of Our Trip I Felt Like I Had Wasted So Much Time. I Could Have Taken Those Hours To Dive Deep Into The Lives Of Those Lovely Women And Gotten To Know Them Much Better.

The Close Female Friends I Already Have Are Simply Walking Neon Signs Of The Lords Provision And Grace In My Life. They Each Have Come About With Little To No Effort Of My Own. They Were Not There And Then They Simply Were And They Have Each Been Wonderful Sources Of Light At Different Points In My Life. But Even Those Wonderful Lovelies Only Know Half As Much About Me As They Think They Do.

For Whatever Reason They Lord Felt The Need In His Wisdom To Make My Brain The Dumping Ground For Other Peoples Problems *Not Complaining AT ALL.* I Love The Fact That Others Feel They Can Confide In Me And They Expect An Answer From Me That Not Only Comes From My Heart But Is Saturated In Biblical Truth. I've Had People Walk Up To Me In Stores, Gas Stations, At School, and The List Could Go On. If I Make Eye Contact It's Over lol They Start To Pour Out Their Hearts And Honestly There's No Where Else I'd Rather Be Because I Know What It's Like To Just Need To Get Those Word Out Of Your Head And Into The Space Outside Of You.

Carlos: Babe...I Don't Think You Understand How Important You Are To So Many People
Me: *In My Head* I Don't Think You Understand How Important You Are Because I Don't Trust Other People.

At The Heart Of It I Have Major Trust Issues. I LOVE People And I've Made A Life Long Effort To Be An Open Ear And To Keep From Having A Condemning Tongue. But...I Don't Give Others *Especially Women* The Benefit Of The Doubt. In My Head For Years I've Built Major Walls To Try And Keep People Out Of My Heart And My Head Because I Struggle With The Idea Of Unconditional Love.

If I Struggle With The Idea Of God's Unconditional Love For Me You Can Bet I Don't Give Credit To A Strangers Capacity To Love Me.

So To The Question.
Do Any Of You Ladies Have Issues With Forming Strong Female Relationships? Honestly Do Your Friends Really Know You Like They Think They Do? How Important Is Community For Sisters In The Faith? How Does That Need Change Over Time? What Can Those Of Us That Struggle With This Issue Do?